英语小笑话大全

1、He Won Tommy: How is your little brother Johnny Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: Thats too bad. How did that happen Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window and he won. 他赢了 汤姆约翰尼你小弟弟好吗 约翰尼他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆真糟糕怎么回事儿 约翰尼我们做游戏看谁能把身子探出窗外最远他赢了。

2、I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked What happened

A kid bit me replied Ivan. Would you recognize him if you saw him again asked his mother. Id know him any where said Ivan. I have his ear in my pocket. 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问“发生了什么事” “一个男孩咬了我一口”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”

3、A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday I gave it to a poor old woman he answered. Youre a good boy said the mother proudly. Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman She is the one who sells the candy. 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢” “她是个卖糖果的。”

4、Drunk One day a father and his little son were going home. At this age the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now he asked Whats the meaning of the word Drunk dad Well my son his father replied look there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk. But dad the boy said theres only ONE policeman 醉酒 一天父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道“爸爸‘醉’字是什么意思” “唔孩子”父亲回答说“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个那么我就算醉了。” “可是爸爸 ”孩子说“那儿只有一个警察呀”

5、Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guests plate. The visitor smiled put the cheese into his mouth and then said: You must have better eyes than your mother sonny. Where did you find the cheese In the rat-trap sir replied the boy. 好客 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时家里没有奶酪了于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿他拿着一片奶酪回到房间把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说“孩子你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪” “在捕鼠夹上先生。”那小男孩说。

6、Nest and Hair My sister a primary school teacher was informed by one of her pupils that a